How to choose the right therapists — the questions nobody thinks to ask

Not all therapists are created equal, and the right fit matters enormously. A technically skilled therapist who doesn't click with your child will make less progress than a good therapist who gets them. Here's how to find the right match.

Questions about approach: What is your treatment philosophy? How do you set goals — and will I be involved? Do you send home practice activities? How do you handle it when a child refuses to participate? (The answer to that last one tells you a lot.) A therapist who forces compliance is very different from one who adjusts the activity to re-engage the child.

Questions about experience: Have you worked with children who have my child's specific diagnosis? How many years have you practiced with this age group? What does a typical session look like? Can I observe a session? Red flag: any therapist who says you cannot observe should give you pause. Transparency is non-negotiable when someone is working with your child.

Questions about fit: Watch your child during sessions. Do they seem comfortable? Engaged? Does the therapist adjust when your child is struggling, or do they push through? Does the therapist talk to you after sessions, explaining what they worked on and why?

Finally, remember that it's okay to switch therapists. This isn't a marriage — it's a professional service. If the fit isn't working after a reasonable trial (typically 6-8 sessions), you are not a difficult parent for trying someone else. You're an advocate.